PLEASE, DON’T CALL ME

Don’t Call Me on WhatsApp

You know you’ve made it on Medium when you’ve got a WhatsApp impersonator

Amy Sea
3 min readSep 14, 2023

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a photo of someone telling me, Amy Sea to call them on whatsApp.
Medium comments photo adapted on Canva

To My Readers Who Received the Request to Call Me on WhatsApp,

Don’t call me.

That’s not me.

I feel violated, like when I saw my name on a bathroom wall saying “For a good time call 1–234–5678 offering a good time. Please, girl. I don’t answer my phone.

Disclaimer: I have never seen my name on a bathroom wall offering any services for a good time. I have a kid. I go to bed at 8. If anyone suggested to call me for a good time, they’d be lying.

Another reason not to call me is I don’t answer my phone. Ask anyone. They’d tell you. “She doesn’t answer her goddamn phone. Who does she think she is? The President?”

I didn’t answer my phone way before texting was preferable to talking. I know it’s cool not to answer your phone these days, but I was not answering my phone in the 70s and 80s. I was a trailblazer.

Don’t call me because when I do answer my phone, I’m not always friendly. If I’m in the middle of something, I don’t even say hello. I’ll just sit there and wait for you to tell me why you’re calling.

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Amy Sea

100 X Top Writer, Editor— MuddyUm Editor, Breast Stories Editor-in-Chief — Comedian, Satirist, Humorist, Top Writer. Publisher of Breast Stories.